Weddings and Speeches

Well, it has happened. My sister has gotten married (and to a wonderful man at that). I cannot even believe how fast it all flew by. Yeah I know, everyone says that, but it's so true. So how does the day go in the household of a bride? Well let me give you a play-by-play from the Maid of Honor's perspective.

Yesterday morning I woke up to the obnoxious sound of a vacuuming, my family conquering the dirt on the stairs which happen to be right near my room. I had planned on waking up at 7am, but thanks to this vacuum-extravaganza and my family's argument over "who would vacuum the stairs and who would go eat breakfast," 6am was my new wake-up time. Well, that and I realized I forgot to print out my speech.. which would have been bad.
Grace ran into my room (for the last time ever as a single woman) and was surprised by the fact that I was awake so early, because to be quite frank, I am not a morning person. I wish I was, but unfortunately I am not. So anyway, most of the morning was a blur due to hurried breakfast eating, intense hair and make-up sessions, and lots of picture-taking.
Off to the church we went in the limo, Cass accidentally digging her heel into my toe. It's amazing how many people you can fit in those things though.. and how hard it is to get in and out of them.

When we got to the church we did some last minute make-up touch-ups and some motivational speeches for the adorable flower girl and ring bearer, along with more moments of blurs, and then came the ceremony. It all was beautiful, and Grace looked incredible as she walked down the aisle with my dad (from what I could see anyway.. it's pretty hard to tell what's going on from the front). A few random favorite parts during all of that- the carpet having issues going down, the flower girl and the ring bearer making their way down the aisle super slowly (until the ring bearer saw his grandpa and ran ahead hahah), and of course the mispronunciation of our last name by our pastor of 10 years. Gotta love it.
Also a favorite part? Watching Kurt's expression as he stared at my sister :]. Way too precious.

After the ceremony were the infamous wedding party pictures which we took at a park close by to the reception hall. You'd be surprised what interesting conversations take place amidst the picture-taking extravaganza.. the photographers have no idea.

The reception was a great time filled with food, hanging out, and speeches. I gave my speech to Grace, which went fine except for the fact that I shake uncontrollably when speaking in public every time. It's pretty bad.. and pretty embarrassing, but what can ya do? It happens. So here is the speech that I gave :].

Memories: Grace and Kurt’s Wedding Day
 Saturday, May 28^th, 2011

To be completely honest, this speech was pretty difficult to write. How do you contain a lifetime of memories on one sheet of paper? Well, I guess I have to begin somewhere.

First I would like to say, thank you, Grace. Thank you for spending time with me, your baby sister (even if it involved some bargaining on my part). For those of you who do not know, Grace does have a knack for negotiation. Grace’s form of bargaining would go a little something like this: “Here, Lena, I have a great idea. If you leave me alone for an hour, I will play with you for five whole minutes.” I joke about this, but in reality, a high school student sacrificing time to play with an obnoxious eight-year-old unfailingly exemplifies the love of Christ in her.
            Grace has always been known to radiate this love in the presence of all who meet her. All of you who have been blessed enough to know her have witnessed what a woman of God truly looks like. Some of my favorite memories of Grace and I are the ones we shared while having “sleepovers” in her room. It would always be such a treat to sleep in her room, and the laughs, as well as the arguments over who was taking more of the blankets, always remained abundant. The most important moment of my life, when I fully understood what Jesus Christ did for me on the cross and fully accepted Him into my life, happened during one of these sleepovers with Grace. I know that I am honored to call Grace not only my sister, but my friend. Who else have I shared such interesting experiences with? From our embarrassing attempts to keep up with our unusual exercise videos, to our adventurous trips and hikes with cousins, our unique arrangement of memories can never really be defined. Who can possibly describe our numerous “Mystery Science Theater Marathons” with Abe, our many interesting games with the cousins, or our infamous “girly movies” (or “bonnet movies” as Abe calls them).  

Grace, I guess what I’m trying to say is that the memories aren’t over. While we may never be able to replay your surprise birthday party (the birthday you thought everybody forgot about) or our many Boston College vs. UMass Lowell hockey games (even if you were always the lone B.C. fan), God willing, we will get to experience even more incredible memories in the years to come. I am so happy for you and Kurt as you create your new memories together. I’m so thankful that God brought Kurt into your life to stand by you and be the husband you’ve always dreamed of. I am now forced to share a quote by Grace when she was discouraged that the right guy would never come along (long before the times of Kurt Marvin). Our cousin Cass and I tried to convince her that her “knight in shining armor” would come for her soon. Grace replied with, “Well what happens if he was delayed...what happens if his horse died or something?!" Thankfully, Kurt’s “horse” never died and he never was delayed, but rather was brought into her life in God’s perfect timing. Kurt, I know you will love my big sister with the love of Christ and I thank God that she will be the wife of such a godly man whom I can now call my brother. 

So, I guess this speech went over the “one page” limit, which is probably my cue to end it. To conclude this I would just like to thank God for all of the memories we have made, the memories we are now making on Grace and Kurt’s wedding day, and the memories that we will make in the future. I would like to leave you with one verse that I hope you will remember from this day: Psalm 91:9-11 “Because you have made the LORD, who is my refuge, Even the Most High, your dwelling place, No evil shall befall you, Nor shall any plague come near your dwelling; For he shall give His angels charge over you, to keep you in all your ways.”

God bless you in your new life together. I love you so much, Grace and Kurt.

The Blog of a Hurried Maid of Honor..

Cleaning? More? Right now. Ok. I will do that. Why am I even posting on here you ask? Because I feel as though the most interesting blogs are done under pressure and in stressful situations. So here I am, letting out stress on this blog for the world to laugh at. I think the neighbors can hear us freaking out over how much more cleaning we have to do in this house, but that's ok. I wonder if the neighbors think we're slightly insane? Maybe they even believe our house is actually not a house but an asylum. Sometimes I wonder that too.. just kidding. But seriously folks, do you ever wonder what your neighbors can actually hear next door? Think about it.

At least my room is clean. Why did I clean my room first? No one is even coming into my room..
Sometimes I wonder about myself.

Now there is an eerie lull in our house.. I think something is wrong. It's quiet.. too quiet. Normally there would be immense stressing at this time, but instead everyone is going about their business quietly. That also could be a sign that no one is actually even doing anything productive. It's probably the latter. Oh dear. Procrastination is apparently the way to go (spoken by a true college student).Oh wait, barely anyone's home now. This also could be why.

The dwarfs in my closet are even motionless. Yes, there are fantastical beings living in the depths of my room, which I have come to grips with many years ago. At first it was a fire hazard, and then it became a tool to scare all trespassing children. Wow, I really do sound like I came out of an asylum. Maybe I should write a fantasy book about it. I feel like that could become a best-seller, don't you? (Not because I wrote it, but because it involves dwarfs who live in my closet).

Why do I always hear gunshots outside? Do my neighbors have secret civil wars in the woods or is there a shooting range somewhere nearby? I'm not sure how I feel about either. I currently have no emotion towards those ideas actually. That's probably not a good sign, because if I happened to be attacked by some wild hooligan with a gun, I apparently react in a nonchalant and emotionless manner, expressing no fear, but rather confusion. It's both a blessing and a curse to remain in constant confusion, I believe. It's a blessing because one's lifespan probably does not decrease due to constant fear, but rather remains pretty much the same due to lack of understanding on current situations. It's a curse because one is.. well.. clueless.

This is THE most A.D.D. post I have ever written. By far. So THIS is what it's like to be a maid of honor? The mind turns to mush and all energy and thought is put into cleaning the house, making sure the bride-to-be looks pretty and has the least possible stress, keeping everyone else calm, and making sure people are actually being productive. Those may seem like easy tasks, but I can tell you right now that they are not. I am not naturally an extremely calm person to begin with, so this overall situation is like giving a court jester the duty of a right-hand man of the king. Not a good idea.

Alright, so crazy experience from cleaning just now- cockroach. You know it was necessary to clean when you find a cock roach near the trashcan. Bugs don't normally gross me out to the point of wanting to up chuck, but this cock roach really made me feel sick to the depths of my stomach. I felt sort of bad for it, but at the same time couldn't help but relish in the victory over this disgusting creature. I wonder why God made cock roaches.. what is even their purpose? To gross out the world and all its inhabitants? Maybe cock roaches are supposed to be an example of how to treat sin? Get sickened by it and then exterminate it. Weird parallel, but it really makes me wonder. I think God puts really nasty bugs on earth for a reason.. maybe even this particular reason which I just addressed.
Wouldn't be surprised.

Ok.. this is enough scattered blogging. I think its time to show the world my true strangeness in its entirety now.

Insecurities

Insecurities.
Insecurities revolved around the world's definition of beauty.
Insecurities revolved around the world's definition of talent.
Insecurities revolved around the world's definition of love.
Like most teenaged girls and young women, I have been bombarded with such insecurities my entire life. So why bring them up now? Why even write about them when previous blogs I have written have already touched upon areas of these issues? Because I wish to be honest, and I wish go deeper in these insecurities to give God the glory, because after all, when I am weak, then I am strong.

In this specific post, I'm going to just discuss beauty and love, because those are the two that I have been specifically struggling with recently. I also have written about talents in previous blogs, so feel free to scroll back and check those out.

On beauty...

The world pushes its distorted and ungodly images of beauty, talent, and love upon every human being, but especially upon women. We are told that to be beautiful, we must place artificial masks of clay upon our visage to cover our "flawed faces." We are told that to be beautiful, we must dress in a way that not only reveals our bodies to the world, but also flaunts ourselves in a way that idolizes ourselves in our "perfections." We not only become idols to all who may find us beautiful, but we also become idols to ourselves as we pour our energy and time into OURSELVES.
Well, what does GOD say about beauty? What does GOD, the Creator of mankind, nature, and all that exists, tell us about beauty in HIS Word?
1 Peter 3:3-4

³ Do not let your adornment be merely outward—arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel— ⁴ rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God.

In the eyes of God, the Inventor of beauty and the Mastermind behind all created things,
beauty begins in the heart. God does not see beauty in fake, obnoxious women who parade themselves like peacocks on display. Humility and meekness are qualities of beauty in the eyes of God. God does not see immodesty and vain focus as beauty. Modesty and eyes which are fixed upon God are qualities of beauty in the eyes of God. Don't get me wrong, there's nothing immoral about make-up and jewelry, but when our focus is on such things it is then that we have failed ourselves. When our life depends on an artificial beauty, it is then that we have stripped ourselves down to a shallow, meaningless worth.
1 Samuel 16:7

⁷ But the LORD said to Samuel, “Do not look at his appearance or at his physical stature, because I have refused him. For the LORD does not see as man sees; for man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.”

Lately I have been struggling with comparing myself to others, especially in areas of physical attractiveness. I can tell you right now that because of this specific issue, Facebook has really become an enlarged problem for me, and if it wouldn't be for staying in touch with people from school, I would immediately delete it (I'm still contemplating the idea). It's true though- people display their photographs of themselves, including myself, wishing to parade their beauty and gain complements from the world. This satisfaction that we gain from these compliments, I can tell you right now, leaves us empty and unfulfilled. This "beauty" is not lasting and will fade with age. This "beauty," as declared by the world, does not define our inner state by any means, but rather can easily twist our hearts to believe lies about ourselves.
The world tells us that beauty revolves around how we perceive ourselves, which in a way is true. Yet the world manages to twist such a truth into a perception which states "I should be the center of attention. To strut around as if I own the world tells those in the world that I am confident and beautiful." The Bible does not by any means support this definition of our self-perception, but rather focuses on how we see ourselves in regards to God. "I am God's creation. He has designed me in His image and has fashioned me to be exactly as I should be. Life is not about me and what I think I should be, but rather about God and who He has created me to be in order to serve Him. It's not about me, it's about HIM."
The reason I felt the need to write about this was not because I see the many girls around me acting this way, but that I myself have struggled with this ungodly perception of myself and self-centered approach to beauty. This is more to me than to anyone else, but if it impacts anyone in a positive way, then to God be the glory.


 On love...

How has the world defined love? Plastered upon the media and every other form of communication used by the world exists the world's blinded definition of love which tells us that our self worth relies in other human beings. We are told that to know love, we receive. We are told that in order to understand love, we must gain both physical and emotional benefits for ourselves. According to the world's standards, love is the passionate emotion we feel for someone.. but that is as deep as it goes. According to GOD, the Creator of emotions and love and life, what is love?
Romans 5:6-8

⁶ For when we were still without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly. ⁷ For scarcely for a righteous man will one die; yet perhaps for a good man someone would even dare to die. ⁸ But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

The true definition of love is sacrifice. GOD's definition of love is Jesus Christ. So how do we accomplish true love in all it's holiness and beauty? Be Christ-like. How do we know what Christ is like? Read God's Word.
Love is not satisfaction in gaining, but in giving. Love is not what we may receive, but what we may give. Love is not what pleasures we may temporarily feel, but what Christ displays in His loyalty, sacrifice, faithfulness, purity, and absolute humility.
Love is not simply having a boyfriend and all is hunky dory.
Love is being willing to die for this person.
Do I love the world with a sacrificial and selfless love? If I don't, I do not know love.

Lately, I have been struggling with being content in my state of singleness as I see all the "happy couples" in "love" all around me. While many may indeed understand love, I have been forced to evaluate my understanding of love. In this discontentment, I am telling God that He is not enough. In this occasional jealousy I obtain, I am telling God that I do not understand His love and in reality do not love Him with a true love. To understand love I must be first satisfied in my Lord and Savior's true and most precious love ever shown. If I cannot be content and thrilled in the most deep and passionate love to exist, how can I ever even begin to be content with failing, frail, and faltering human love?


Like I said earlier, this blog post is for me. This may have been a little bit too honest, but look at this as an in-depth insight into my own personal journal entry. I choose to post this because I realize that many other young women are most likely struggling with these issues, and maybe, just maybe this will touch someone's heart. Maybe God will use this in someone's life who truly needed this reminder, just as I have needed this reminder.

When I am Weak, Then I am Strong.

Forgiveness. Patience. Self-Control.
All things I've been learning constantly this week... and my whole life. I won't go into most of the details, but I will tell you this much- I prayed that God would work on me this summer, and He has been.

This week especially, I have been really seeing my sinful self come out in the area I struggle with the most- my mouth. I've dealt with difficult people many a time, and many a time I have failed in my reactions. What is it that gets me every time? Why do I feel the need to respond to people who test my patience and give them the satisfaction of setting my temper off? Why can't I just shut my mouth and be done with it? I think I needed this reminder that I still struggle with this and must continue to look to Christ as my source of patience and strength. In a way, I treasure moments like this, because it's in these miserable moments that I see how much I truly need a Savior. My pride? Oh, it's been stripped.

Regarding forgiveness- how do you forgive those who don't care if you forgive them or not?
...Oh wait *points to Jesus Christ*
Over and over I am reminded that Jesus forgives me, a sinner who turns her back on the God of the universe in order to please myself. Over and over I am reminded that this Jesus Christ not only forgives, but died in the place of those who do not want forgiveness.
Lord, give me the love it takes to sacrifice myself for those who don't care...

Patience and Self-Control? Well, it's probably good that this little issue is being addressed now in my life. Keeping my mouth shut.. this is the reaction I SHOULD have to people who really know how to bring out the temper in me, but rather what is my reaction? SNAP.
Mouth, why do you work so well? Can't we just.. put a muzzle on or something? Unfortunately, I don't think people would really react well to a muzzled girl walking around... "Who let her out of the asylum? *panic*"

It's interesting how our strengths can really be our weaknesses. I've never been the girl who needs prying open in order to get what's going on inside of me; expressing myself has never really been an issue for me. As you can see, this can be both a pro and a con wrapped in one. On the plus side, I am not really afraid of addressing issues that need to be addressed. Con wise- sometimes telling people how you feel about something isn't the best idea.
I definitely learned this the hard way junior high through sophomore year of high school. One mental note from sophomore year- most of the time people don't care whether you agree with them or not, and to tell them is to just feed an already unfriendly fire. The point is that it's not always my place to tell them that I find their arguments are incredibly illogical =P. Rather, my place is to love them. Unless someone is legitimately sinning, most of the stuff we argue about is ridiculous. What if they initiate it and continue to initiate it? Stay away from them. Walk away. This is one lesson I've recently been learning- sometimes it's better to stay completely away from the person rather than risk a purposeless argument which they will most likely initiate.

What have I been learning from all of this? Through these issues in my own life, I have been learning that through my weaknesses, Christ's strength shines through me. Instead of people seeing my successes, they see my failures being erased through Jesus Christ's successes. As Seven Places' song "Perspective" says, "It's when I'm stranded and empty handed I become dependent on You." My hall for next year's theme verse is 2 Corinthians 12: 9-10:

⁹ And He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. ¹⁰ Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ’s sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

Through my insufficiency, Jesus Christ's grace is sufficient. Through my weakness, Christ's strength is made perfect. In my infirmities, the power of Christ is able to transform me and mold me to be his beautiful creation. "For when I am weak, then I am strong." Those words hold a power which none can describe fully in words. An unbeliever cannot possibly understand this sense of peace in Jesus Christ. Rather than trying to be perfect in myself constantly and trying to be good enough on my own merit, the power of the blood of Jesus Christ has made me perfect. When I am weak, then I am strong.



Anyway, I'm not sure why I decided to write on this, especially since it's not a new struggle for me (just a newly remembered struggle). Maybe someone needed to read this, or maybe I just needed to write it. Either way, here it is, written and posted. Happy Tuesday!

God Bless.

Oh Check It Out! It's May 22nd!

Well, since everyone is losing their mind over this May 21st Judgment Day shenanigan, I couldn't help myself but to give my two cents.

First off, I think it's quite embarrassing how ignorant this Camping man makes Christian's look. Sorry buddy, but real Christians know their Bible a little better than that.

Mark 13: 32-37 
³² But of that day and hour no one knows, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father. ³³ Take heed, watch and pray; for you do not know when the time is. ³⁴ It is like a man going to a far country, who left his house and gave authority to his servants, and to each his work, and commanded the doorkeeper to watch. ³⁵ Watch therefore, for you do not know when the master of the house is coming—in the evening, at midnight, at the crowing of the rooster, or in the morning— ³⁶ lest, coming suddenly, he find you sleeping. ³⁷ And what I say to you, I say to all: Watch!

Wait? What's that the Bible says? We won't know the day nor the time? Hmm.. Mr. Camping, looks like you forgot to read that section of the Bible when you took the Bible out of context and assumed the rest through speculation and vivid imagination.

One thing that really struck me as I was contemplating this whole "Judgement Day" trash being falsely prophesied by this random man was the uproar it has caused in society. People hear "judgement" and "apocalypse" and suddenly go ballistic. Why is it that when people have a certain date they are given they believe it, freak out, and are willing to give up everything for it, but when they are told that Christ is coming back sometime that we don't know when, they give a deaf ear and continue with their lives? Yesterday I got my hair cut and when the woman cutting my hair heard that I was a Christian, she asked me what I thought about the whole "Judgement Day" scares. I told her exactly what I just wrote: it's bogus. She told me that she had been reading information on it online and it was "sort of freaking her out." Even this random woman had been obviously contemplating the thought of Christ coming back, and the thought of Him coming tomorrow scared her. We are suddenly stirred when we think its tomorrow, but what we don't remember is that it could be tomorrow. I do not by any means believe that this man's ridiculous false prophecy will come true tomorrow, but rather am stating that Christ could return any day. Today, as I was thinking of all these current issues, I realized that most of the time I am not living my life like it's my last time. How much time do I spend worrying about the future instead of focusing on living for God right now? How motivated am I to spread the gospel of Jesus Christ and share the truth with those who don't know it? Am I living my life like today could be my last? Am I living my life to the fullest, keeping in mind that Christ could come back any day?
Don't get me wrong- this does not mean to live in fear, constantly speculating when Christ may be coming back. On the contrary, this should simply motivate us to fully live our lives to their God-given potentials. I know that time is often something I take for granted. I assume that I will always have tomorrow or that I can tell this person about Christ when "they ask." What if they never ask and we never tell them?

And to those who have not accepted Christ:
How quick are you to jump on the "judgement day" band wagon, but at the same time are completely unwilling to accept that Jesus Christ is Lord? Do not be deceived by these people who claim they can tell when Christ is coming back, because that's the thing- we don't know and won't know until He actually comes. Thankfully, we do not need to live in this helpless fear, dreading the day when Jesus Christ comes back to this earth. He has given us a hope from our sinful state and has opened a door for our lost souls. Jesus Christ has made a way to live a life of peace and assurance through His sacrifice on the cross and resurrection from the dead.

Acts 16:30-31
³⁰ And he brought them out and said, “Sirs, what must I do to be saved?”
³¹ So they said, “Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and you will be saved, you and your household.” ³² Then they spoke the word of the Lord to him and to all who were in his house. ³³ And he took them the same hour of the night and washed their stripes. And immediately he and all his family were baptized. ³⁴ Now when he had brought them into his house, he set food before them; and he rejoiced, having believed in God with all his household.

That's sort of a brief little summary of the truth, but if any of you reading this would like to discuss this more or have any questions, you can comment this blog up ;].

Those are just a few thoughts I had today regarding this "end of the world" business.
God Bless!

P.S. This was written on May 20th, 2011, but I'm posting it on May 22nd, 2011.. teehee.