Saturday, April 30, 2011

A 50 Minute Math Class

My notes during class on Friday....


Dear Kristen,
I really liked reading your little English 102 thought pattern thing, and it just re-reminded me about how much I love you and how *special* you truly are ;]. So I am currently in the most pointless Math class ever. I am not actually learning anything, which is unfortunate. So what am I thinking right now? Here goes nothing:

1. My teacher really has broken a world record for "wearing the same shirt for an entire semester."
2. There are lots of x's and y's on the board...
3. I probably should not have daydreamed until AFTER he said "this will all be on the test."
4. Good thing I've learned this better on my own anyway...
5. I'm wearing cool rings! I think I want more.
6. He talks about pacman a lot. I'm not sure how that relates to math.
7. I miss Mrs. Boutrus and her ability to teach...
8. Ah! It's Friday! Friday! Gotta get down on Friday! Everybody is looking forward to the weekend.. Partyin' Partyin', YEAH! Anyway....
9. *Blank stare*
10. Woah! I just learned something! In math! In class! Just now! The teacher explained it! ohhh happy day.
11. Wow, this is moving to the back page now. Score.
12. Yesterday was Thursday, Thursday, Today, it is Friday, Friday... we so excited!
13. Sorry I keep quoting Rebecca Black. The unfortunateness about such an awful song is that it gets stuck in your head...
14. I just want this class to end so I can go to English class.. because I love English. My class is awesome.
15. I am way to hyper to be in Math.
16. The weather is pretty.
17. 10 minutes.
18. In convocation they talked about a wolf dying. I got sad.
19. I've been working out. I am so sore. Will I have muscles soon? Yes. Will my tummy be toned? You betcha.
20. My teacher yelled "Aw, steak!" in frustration. It may have been "Oh, stink." But I like steak better.
21. Matrix shouldn't be in this class. Rated R movies aren't allowed here. Tisk Tisk.
22. I feel like this is a riddle I don't want to solve.
23. I miss Kristen and Bethany.
24. I saw a girl wearing a cape today and it reminded me of Kristen.
25. I haven't watched Homestar Runner in a while. I should.
26. This is really long. No one will probably enjoy this.. except Kristen. And Bethany. and Carla. and probably Catherine and Laura. Ok so, some people may enjoy this.
KITSOVER! Bye!


That's what I learned in Math on Friday.

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

JSYK- Just So You Know (Please see #7)

Just so you all know, this blog is going to be very scattered and random, because I have a lot to say (what's new), so prepare yourself for a little piece of A.D.D.

Current struggles:
1. Not being satisfied with who I am/ Not finding my entire identity in Christ
2. Being apathetic to school work.

Recently, I've been really struggling to be satisfied with who I am, both physically and socially. For every girl reading this, you know those days when you look in the mirror and you just feel like you're not as pretty as you'd like? When you feel like every guy has just looked directly past you to see the prettier girl behind you? When you just wish someone would notice you? Well, for me, it's been one of those months.
I have realized, however, that months like these are required in my life to keep me on track spiritually. To understand my lack of worth from looks and physical talents is to understand my ultimate worth in Christ. The physical does not make me who I am; the physical just allows me to serve God out loud. My looks do not define me; my looks make me a unique creation of God, but that is as far is it goes.
Who am I?
I am a child of God.
I am a temple of the Holy Spirit.
I am a woman seeking to please God and grow closer to Him.
I am a human being on a mission to reach others for eternity.
I am more than what I look like or what I can do- I am who God has made me and what He leads me through.


Schoolwork. 2 weeks. I can do this. Apathy? Yes, it's happening. Can I let it happen? No! Should I keep going? Yes! Finish hard. Win the race. Ace it all. That is all.


Current loves:
1. Amazing, godly girl friends!
2. Lake time.
3. Two weeks left of school.
4. That I'm going to be a prayer leader next year.
5. Getting tan again
6. Going to the gym with my roommate
7. Typing "jsyk" after every sentence and it making up an entire conversation with one of my best friends (jsyk).
8. The fact that I'm going to be working at a ranch this summer.. and on top of that with Mary Anna!
9. The fact that the Rot is getting significantly better... I like it a lot.
10. Wearing dresses.

Ok, so this blog wasn't as A.D.D. as I thought it would be! Only slightly! That's a plus. Go me!
God Bless & I love you all :]

Sunday, April 24, 2011

An Easter Blog

Well, the homesickness is really hitting me now with half of the campus gone for Easter break while I spend my first Easter away from home at a church that isn't my home church.

Most Easters, my family would turn on the Jesus film, which gives the life of Jesus according to the gospel of John. Since I can't be home, I decided to watch the Jesus movie on my own here at school to keep up some family traditions and give myself a little taste of home on Easter. While reading the Bible is always incredible and penetrates my heart whenever I read it, being able to have a visual aid in movie form on the life of Jesus is such a blessing. There's something about this movie which really helps me in feeling as though I am right there with Jesus Christ, experiencing what He experienced, witnessing His incredible miracles, watching God in the form of a man pouring His heart out to those in need, which really tears at my heart. It really helps it all come alive in my mind. The more I watch this word-for-word account of Jesus' life from John's perspective, the more it reminds me of Christ's unfailing love for the world, even in the midst of sin and destruction.

One scene which really pierces my heart is when Mary Magdalene, a prostitute comes into the house where Jesus is visiting and wipes His feet with her tears and hair in complete repentance and sorrow of her lifestyle. The people eating with Jesus all scatter as if she is inhumane and refuse to be near her. Instead of doing the same, Jesus sympathetically lifts her up off the ground and tells her to "Go and sin no more." What really struck me is the complete and utter forgiveness Jesus Christ has for her. Even in His holiness, He does not refuse to see her, but compassionately reaches out to her and shows her complete love and forgiveness. One thing we often forget is His telling her to "sin no more." Christ does not simply overlook her sin and continue on, but addresses her sin, tells her to change and live for Him, then completely forgives her, allowing her to have new life in Him. This entire scenario completely blows my mind. The hope that every person has, no matter the past sins he or she has committed, is so real and beautiful. Because of Jesus Christ, we can come to God as lost sinners and leave as new, beautiful creations in Him.

God has really been showing me SO much this Easter, and while it's been so difficult to be away from home, I have realized that Jesus Christ is still risen no matter where I celebrate it. Jesus still conquered death no matter who we are or who we're remembering it with. God is still God, and we are still utterly blessed by the unspeakable gift of salvation. Christ is still the conqueror over death and Satan has still lost.

Thank you, Jesus, for being the best friend anyone could ask for and the most incredible Savior!
 This has definitely been one Easter to remember :].

HAPPY EASTER and God bless!!! He is alive :].

Saturday, April 23, 2011

God Above All Else

God above all else. This is the phrase which haunts me continually and seems to pop up in my mind at random. I guess I would consider this to be my life phrase that I have to repeat in order to stay focused on what really matters for eternity.What is hindering me from fully giving myself to God? What idols consume my time that are unprofitable for my relationship with God? Often I find myself begging God to cleanse my heart so I can fully enjoy the salvation He has given me and completely appreciate His eternal and perfect love.
One verse that comes to mind is Psalm 51: 10-13.

 10  Create in me a clean heart, O God,
         And renew a steadfast spirit within me.
 11 Do not cast me away from Your presence,
         And do not take Your Holy Spirit from me. 
 12 Restore to me the joy of Your salvation,
         And uphold me by Your generous Spirit.
 13 Then I will teach transgressors Your ways,
         And sinners shall be converted to You. 

I love this verse so much. Throughout elementary all up until high school, we would sing a song based on this verse in our classes and chapel services. I don't think the meaning actually penetrated my heart until recently. Today in chapel, the pastor of the Brooklyn Tabernacle, Jim Cymbala, spoke, and he used the analogy of "removing all leaven from Jewish homes during Passover" to describe removing the iniquity of sin in our lives. In order to feel the full blessings of God and receive the full joy of salvation, we must eradicate the little, festering sins in our lives which don't even seem to be a big deal. All sin is a big deal. Unfortunately, not all sin is as obvious as murder. What little sins consume my life? What everyday happenings are actually obsessions which hinder me from having the complete and full relationship I can have with my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ?

Just something that's been on my heart.. for a very very long time.. and probably will continue to be throughout my life. Hope this encouraged you a bit and I hope that God maybe used it in your life somehow.

God bless. <3

Monday, April 18, 2011

All Things New

A day to remember- it's a love-hate relationship.

Name all the things a rushed college student tends to dread...
Not making it into any of the classes I need for my major? Not understanding the material in two of my classes? Not being able to find a speech topic? Oh wait, and being sick and unable to focus on top of it all?
Yup, you guessed it- that was my day.

But guess what- God's got my back.
And guess what- I have twizzlers.
And guess what- Dayquil tends to work wonders.

When life seems to say, "HA. You can't do it. HA. You're frail and human. Just give up while you're behind," I just like to say, "HA. You're right, I can't do it, but God can. HA. I am frail and human, but God is all-powerful and supernatural. I won't give up, because I'm not running alone."

It's days like this, the dreary, frustrating, head-in-a-fog, sort of days that make the devil get a big head.
But guess what- compared to God, he's got a tiny brain jingling around all emptily in his giant head of hot air.
And guess what- I have God on my side.
And guess what- Tomorrow is a new day.

That's one thing I've recently been learning.. God is a God of newness. New creatures, new life, new days.
2 Corinthians 5:17- "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new."
I can tell you that I am so thankful for a God of second chances. I am so thankful for a God who loves us even during our times of bad attitudes, complaining tongues, and cynical perceptions. He makes all things NEW.

God Bless.

Saturday, April 16, 2011

A friend is a Gift from God.

I am so incredibly thankful that God has me exactly where He wants me.

As I look at everyone in their various stages of life and completely unique situations, I am thankful that I am where I am. It's crazy to think that I'm at the age where my friends, family, and schoolmates are getting married and having children. Growing up is a weird thing, but God knows where we're supposed to be at and when we should be there. I am so thankful to be in an incredible Christian university, making incredible friendships and growing intensely closer to God. These experiences in my life are experiences I would never have encountered except for being right here, right now. I can confidently say that these friends I am making in college right now will be the friends I carry with me my entire life. God has blessed me so much to have given me two incredible roommates this year, both wonderful and beautiful in their own way.

Carla's quiet, yet wise and passionate spirit has influenced me incredibly. While she juggles school, family, and a boyfriend, she never is one to put her friends on a back-burner. Carla's ability to overlook wrongs which people have committed is definitely to be praised, and I admire her slow temper. Carla's unique mildness displays a confidence which I envy, and her love for God is to be admired. Our similar sense of humor definitely keeps things interesting, and our ability to follow each others A.D.D. conversations is definitely a sign of being "kindred spirits." I'm thankful that Carla is willing to watch my random girly movies with me on late nights, and that we can share our food, even if she does risk my dropping crumbs on her bed. I love this girl with all of my heart.
Kaytee's outgoing, bold persona has definitely pushed me a little bit out of my comfort zone. While I thought I was friendly, Kaytee gave a whole new meaning to the word "friendly." Kaytee goes out of her way to make sure every person feels special and loved, and she refuses to allow anyone to be left out. This intentional attitude has definitely taught me so much and I am thankful to have her as an influence in my life. Kaytee's fun-loving free spirit brings joy to all who spend time with her. A dull moment definitely never exists when Kaytee is around. I am thankful for the random things that bond us, whether girly tv shows or random dance-sprees. I love this girl so much!

God knew EXACTLY what I needed this year and he blessed me with the two most amazing roommates. Freshman year would have failed to be as awesome as it has been without them, and I will forever thank and praise God for His unfailing love.
I'm also so incredibly thankful for the other beautiful ladies God has placed in my life here at school to be life-time-worthy friends <3.

Rosemary remains a loyal, tender-hearted friend who always puts others before herself. Her generosity always exists and her love for God and people shines through every single thing she says and does.
Amber's heart for God and people is one I look up to greatly and always will. Her dedication to ministry and constant sacrifice to its time-consuming tasks proves her be a faithful servant of God.
Sarah's incredible testimony through trials has inspired me immeasurably. Her perseverance to be the godly woman that God wants her to be has stretched my faith and given me a motivation that could have only beento retrieved by knowing her.
Mary Anna's thoughtful, obedient soul keeps her strong in times of pain. Her love for God pushes through any doubt or fears that exist in her life, and her passion to serve, be involved, and grow intellectually is evident through her constant hard work and effort. This girl's work ethic definitely inspires me.

Please don't be hurt or offended if you're not on this list, because there are SO many others whom I love dearly and who have impacted my life incredibly this year. The list could go on and on, but these are just a few people that came to mind right now. I am so thankful for all of you and your influence in my life. I pray that we will remain close throughout the years and keep encouraging each other spiritually. I love you all so much!

God Bless.

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Now and Soon

The sun is shining, the birds are chirping, and the wind is blowing everything away, including me. CFAW is over and the schedule is now significantly in order. While stress will continue to be prevalent, I'm looking forward to Wednesday, because that means that Tuesday's ultra stress will be defeated! I am currently so hungry that I could eat a few zebras. Who do I see right now? A guy whose hair is way too long and whose use of a headband just makes it look worse. A multitude of couples doing a multitude of awkward things. College students who are particularly chipper due to the incredibly gorgeous weather.

Lately, I've been feeling the homesickness coming on. The loneliness tends to creep in every once in a while, but thankfully I have a God who never leaves me and thankfully He's given me a group of great friends. Classes seem to be extra monotonous today and life continues on as normal. While it's nice to be back in the routine of things, I won't lie- I had a lot of fun with some old friends (and new friends) this weekend.

A recent answer to prayer: I have found a hall to be prayer leader on next year! I am so excited to see what God will do, but also very nervous for a new year with new roommates and new leadership. I am so pumped to be working with this leadership next year. Definitely a godly, humble, and loving group of ladies, and I cannot wait. I always dread the unknown, but I thank God that He is completely in control and knows exactly what will happen. So many new adventures to come. I cannot even imagine what God will do, and while I know it won't always be easy, I know that God will never bring me to something that He won't bring me through.

Good times ahead :].

Friday, April 1, 2011

The Happs

So, it's been a few days since I posted, and while I technically should be writing a speech in this spare moment of my life, I decided I could blog a quick one.

This week has been much better than the last, thank God. A lot of crazy things have been going on lately. Monday was a little bit crazy with classes all afternoon, dinner with the ladies afterward, Caribbean Craze with the same ladies (this is the dance aerobics class I told you about before), and then a volleyball game after. Definitely a tiring day.

Note to self: exercising more than once in a day may cause athletic overload to one who normally is not exposed to much exertion of active energy.

Tuesday was a day of ridiculous tests and leadership fairs. Prayer leader interviews here I come! One down, six to go. Now just to wait and see where God leads me, or if even leads me to be a prayer leader. Ah, the more I think about the more nervous I get. Being fully committed to disciple, fully love on, and be on 24/7 call for a group of girls definitely is a huge responsibility, but I cannot wait to see what type of blessing it will be.

Wednesday involved mostly just homework and a lot of just hanging out.
This weekend, CFAW has begun. The time when everything on campus is more packed than it needs to be and the entire Liberty staff cater solely to those who do not attend our school. Just kidding, it's not that bad. Ok maybe it is, but there are some things about CFAW that are just fun. 1. the food at our dining hall steps up a few notches. 2. all the activities that happen are always a good time and 3. in general I enjoy helping people around and showing them where to go.

Anyway, those are a few of the happs. Yes, I did just say happs.

God Bless!