As Valentine's Day approaches, I think to myself, "Self, this disease called 'relationships' has eaten all of your best friends. It seems as though you have gained an immunity to such a disease. Bravo, young lass, Bravo."
Seriously, I think I'm the only one left. I feel like Will Smith.. I hope my dog doesn't catch this disease so I don't have to strangle him (and I don't even have a dog, so this could be interesting)...
Or what if I start making friends with manikins? I HATE MANIKINS. We all know they're frozen people (I blame my sister for instilling this irrational fear into my mind). Oh no. I refuse to be friends with manikins. I will sooner become friends with the flesh-eating zombies who have been infected with such a disease.
Yes, I did just write a paragraph comparing Valentine's Day to I Am Legend.
They are basically the same thing. Pretty much. Almost.
So, what am I going to do now that I've survived this epidemic? I think I'm going to learn lots of new useful skills. Like nun-chuck skills. Because we all know that guys like girls with skills. [Bet you haven't heard that quoted in quite a while]. TINA YOU FAT LARD.
I'm not even sure what I was originally blogging about.
Oh yeah, gaining skills. So, other than nun-chuck skills, maybe I should learn karate. I mean, I might need to learn self-defense. Who doesn't? It's a useful skill. Or... cake decorating.
Or I could write a book! That sounds more down my ally.
What should the book be about?
A manikin who strangles his llama? That would be the most terrifying book of all time.
I believe it's time for this post to end.
Seriously, I think I'm the only one left. I feel like Will Smith.. I hope my dog doesn't catch this disease so I don't have to strangle him (and I don't even have a dog, so this could be interesting)...
Or what if I start making friends with manikins? I HATE MANIKINS. We all know they're frozen people (I blame my sister for instilling this irrational fear into my mind). Oh no. I refuse to be friends with manikins. I will sooner become friends with the flesh-eating zombies who have been infected with such a disease.
Yes, I did just write a paragraph comparing Valentine's Day to I Am Legend.
They are basically the same thing. Pretty much. Almost.
So, what am I going to do now that I've survived this epidemic? I think I'm going to learn lots of new useful skills. Like nun-chuck skills. Because we all know that guys like girls with skills. [Bet you haven't heard that quoted in quite a while]. TINA YOU FAT LARD.
I'm not even sure what I was originally blogging about.
Oh yeah, gaining skills. So, other than nun-chuck skills, maybe I should learn karate. I mean, I might need to learn self-defense. Who doesn't? It's a useful skill. Or... cake decorating.
Or I could write a book! That sounds more down my ally.
What should the book be about?
A manikin who strangles his llama? That would be the most terrifying book of all time.
I believe it's time for this post to end.
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